There is something on my heart that I felt I needed to tell
you. And you may not need it now. You may save it away for a day in
the future when you remember these words. And I hope now or then, they
will be of some comfort and strength.
When you were talking
about a clean slate and how you are going to do
everything different and be all business, it reminded me of myself
as a teacher. You know, there are so many times when I do way more than
I should for my students and it seems I work even more for the students
that treat me with little respect. And I would get frustrated that I
would try so hard and then they would still fail. And I would give them
opportunity after opportunity and still, they would fail. So one year,
I decided, that's it. I'm going to do what all the hardcore teachers
say to do. I'm not going to smile for the first month. I'm going to
set expectations from day one. I'm going to hope I can write a student
up within the first week so that everyone will know I mean business.
And I tried. But I couldn't do. Finally, after several years of trying
and failing to change, I have come to accept the fact that I am too
motherly as a teacher to do those things. That I do invest myself way
too much in this profession for little thanks. That I give more than I
receive. And I didn't want to accept it. I thought, "I'm going to
continue to be taken advantage of. I'm going to continue to get
frustrated. I'm going to continue to get hurt." But then I felt that
God needed me to be myself and my students needed me to be that too. I
know you have been hurt by those for whom you have gone above and beyond. I've been there too. But God needs you to be you and the people
He brings into your life need you just the way you are too. On those
difficult days when it all becomes too much again, I try to remind
myself: Blessed are those who show mercy, for mercy shall be theirs.
And then I pray that I can see Christ in need in the people He brings to
my care. And I hope and trust that if I continue to give of myself and
continue to show mercy, that God will be full of mercy with me. And I
have found when I try to live this, God is merciful with me even in my
everyday experiences. How great is our God?
Thank you - not for all
that you do but for who you are each and every day.
God bless you and your ministry!
Friday, May 17, 2013
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